work during the day. GOA trade show during the afternoon and evening. driving in the dark on 355 in the pouring rain listening to the dub of MY RUBICON SEVEN, THE WORLD'S COOLEST STRAIGHT SYNTHPOP GROUP. o/` oh, can you see the sky is falling... o/`

talking to alison. she will be coming. she will be staying with the scotts. we will go to church.

i hate myself because my hart is a fickle thing. because i notice that women are attractive. i want eyes that only see one woman at a time; i don't know whether i am being unrealistic and fixated, or seeking a pure heart. i am confused. i read through a year of diaries over lunchour and it makes me cringe that a month ago i was still raving about kristin. i am no better than jason.

but what do i feel? i don't know. i don't want to 'juggle' the way jason did; but sometimes my heart keeps trying to pick up the juggling bags after my mind has set them down.

she's coming and i'm looking forward to it.

i may be adminning a list server. further buletins as events warrant... i'm too tired to go on.